Oakland Parents Turn Loss Of Daughter Into Inspiration To Help Others
In 1995, at the age of 26, Kristine Morello was diagnosed with a form of cancer known as Ewing’s sarcoma.
In a matter of months her life was to be shortened by this cruel disease. Her legacy of kindness and caring would be secured in the ensuing years by her family’s commitment to lessen the burdens of others who would walk in their shoes.
Marilyn and Rick Morello, Kristine’s parents, moved to Oakland in 1971. The Morellos were a perfect fit for life in Oakland. Kristine and her brothers Brian and Rick, Jr. played lots of sports while attending Oakland schools. They went on to college and made their parents proud in every way.
Kristine studied marketing and became a pharmaceutical rep. Marilyn worked at Ramapo College and Rick ran an insurance business. They were among the earliest team tennis players in town. Marilyn was a past president of the tennis club and Rick coached the kids.
“Everything was going so well for us. We felt blessed,” says Marilyn.
In due time, Kristine met a handsome young man, fell in love and was engaged in May of 1995. The wedding was set for that September, just after her 27th birthday. They bought a home in Wyckoff and mutually agreed to wait to live there until after they were married.
“One day she came home from exercise class and complained of calf pain,” Marilyn said. “We saw Dr. Perkel, who sent us to Sloane-Kettering Hospital in New York City, where she was diagnosed with sarcoma.”
Marilyn remembers Kristine saying, “I’m glad it’s me and not my brothers. I’m the strongest.”
The Morello Family had crossed the Hudson River on the first of many difficult days that lay ahead.
“That day I felt hopeful because we were at the best place for treatment. Kristine was strong-willed and positive, as well.”
Kristine underwent chemo and radiation. The family visited every treatment day for seven months, sometimes even at night when a reaction to the medication made their daughter especially ill.
“The expenses were piling up. The daily trips into the city, including tolls, parking and meals, were pulling us down,” recalled Marilyn.
Marilyn began packing lunch for herself and her husband with enough for hospital staff who were dedicated to their daughter’s care. Staff and family ate their lunch together.
“Rick and I would park a mile away from the hospital where it was cheaper and we’d walk the mile to the hospital. Every little bit helped us to be with our daughter,” she said.
The folks in Oakland’s team tennis began helping to defray the expenses and supplied support and prayers. Many others helped out as well.
“As Kristine underwent chemo treatments, her hair began falling out, so she gave a Hair-Today-Gone-Tomorrow’ party for the cancer unit. It was a big success,”
Marilyn said.
“And she would visit the kids in the unit and listen to them. She would tell them, ‘I understand how you feel today, but tomorrow you need to fight with all your
might.’”
Kristine completed her treatments, and, to inspire the younger patients, she performed a hearty cartwheel for the kids in the unit.
The September 24 th wedding would go ahead. The family was busy with preparations, full of the hope all families have for their loved ones.
“Kristine looked so beautiful the day of her wedding. She wore a wig and a smile to cover the treatments’ effects. We were all so happy,” said Marilyn.
But fate had another plan.
“She was weak and did not feel well, but she wanted very much to host Thanksgiving in her new home.”
But Thanksgiving morning, Kristine called and said, “Mom, I can’t do it.”
“So, we had it at our house instead,” Marilyn said.
On December 7th , Kristine was taken to Valley Hospital.
“My child was dying, yet the carolers came in singing ‘Joy to The World,’” said Marilyn. “We were all in a twilight zone. I prayed to God to fix her or let her go. She passed away on December 14, 1995. Her last words were, ‘It’s too hard to breathe. I’m ready to go.’”
As friends and family came to express sympathy, one couple, the Colangelos, friends who had lost a son, said they were fundraising in his memory to benefit
Columbia Presbyterian Hospital’s palliative care department.
“Our family put their heads together and decided to have our own fundraiser in the spring of 1996. After that, we realized that by joining with the Colangelos, we could raise even more money,” Marilyn said.
The Morello sons, Brian and Rick, Jr., by now were established in the world of business. One son had received his MBA. The brothers discussed their plans with lawyer friends who joined in the effort to establish an approved foundation.
“We decided that our fundraisers would initially be called the Colangelo/Morello Cancer Fund. We had a golf an event with the Knights of Columbus of Oakland that the crowd still comes to after all these years.”
“Our first year, fundraising brought in $7,000,” said Marilyn.
As the scope of the charity’s work was refined, it became The Family Reach Foundation, whose goal was subsidizing families for the expenses they incurred during treatment.
Marilyn added, “Everyone in both families, friends of Kristine’s and her brothers, the people of Oakland and elsewhere, all were working to make us successful. The foundation was growing outside of New Jersey to New York City, to Boston and beyond,” said Marilyn, “all to benefit the families. We knew we could provide a beacon of hope for them.”
Today, the Morello and Colangelo commitment remains as strong as it was 25 years ago. They have lost their daughter, but have benefitted so many in her name.
Marilyn added, “We have worked so passionately and have crafted a foundation that helps people. We are proud to say that in the last 25 years we have helped 61,200 families and brought in $57 million dollars, a far cry from the original $7,000 we brought in that first year. We now work with 400 hospitals and employ social workers who identify families in need of our help.”
When Kristine was a student at Dogwood Hill School, she won an essay contest. In the essay’s last paragraph, she wrote, “Some day I’ll be the kind of person who can contribute something special to Oakland. What could be more important than developing good citizens?”
Terri Casaleggio is a lead writer for the newsletter.